Friday, July 16, 2010

filtering theory

When choosing a romantic partner, I can relate to all of the filters as playing a role in the process. When judging the attractiveness of others, the first step has to be contact. Therefore, the sociological or incidental cues must be there for a relationship to grow. I have had several friends meet a potential partner who moved away for college. More often than not, these relationships suffered because "physical proximity" (pg.158) was not close enough. Usually these relationships ended after a month or two because "maintaining contact with someone thousands of miles away is extremely difficult" (pg.158).

The characteristics that lead me to judge someone as unattractive begin with the preinteraction cues. Once I am in existence in the same space with someone else, the first thing I pick up on is the physical appearance. Although this may be a shallow approach, attractiveness originates in the likeness of a potential partner's "body type or physical beauty"(pg. 161). If there is no physical attraction, I think it would be very difficult to move into the cognitive realm. I think the preinteraction cues can be a stronger filter for some, and weaker for others. Someone may completely reject another in this stage, while others may feel it is important to not judge someone by their looks whatsoever.

Although Duck's theory is brief in the text, the filters seem to fit and make sense when I consider everyday reality and my own experience with relationship partners. All of these cues have been present in my judgment or evaluation of someone I may want to form a romantic relationship with. It's interesting to think about because my last relationship was with someone who I would usually not be physically attracted to. Because I worked with this person, I saw him everyday and got to know him using interaction cues and cognitive cues, I totally changed my view on wanting a relationship with that person. Our comfortability with each other made me reconsider what I wanted out of our friendship, even though I almost filtered that possibility based on preinteraction cues.

1 comment:

  1. First, I have to say that I appreciate your honesty about being physically attracted to someone because it is true. And I like your personal example of your co-worker. I give a similar example. My boyfriend now is someone I would have filtered out immediately due to preinteraction cues but I am so glad I didn't! But then again we did not form a romantic relationship unitl later even though we both had agreeable interaction and cognitive cues. I think it was timing. Anyhow. Your post was very informative and clear about all the cues. Good Job:).

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